Gold Rush 1849 – Where the news is good as gold

CITE: Mayo Clinic

There are some things in life that you would rather not talk about or know about and don’t want to experience. You certainly don’t want someone looking at or poking around in it.  This is not a reference to your business but rather … hemorrhoids.

Oh, the dreaded, ghastly, life-ruining hemorrhoids.

There is nothing pleasant about this topic. There is no way to pretty it up. The fact that you have to sit on them is, however, the straw that eventually breaks the camel’s back, and you find yourself at the doctor’s office, begging for relief because you cannot tolerate it anymore.

Men and women both get hemorrhoids. Women may sprout them while giving birth because the pressure down there is so intense that hemorrhoids can pop out on the spot. Hauling around 30 extra pounds and experiencing constipation during pregnancy also sets up a female for a whopping case of “piles” as they used to be called.

Truck drivers get hemorrhoids because they sit so much and for such long periods of time.

People who regularly lift and lug heavy objects get hemorrhoids because of the strain.

Someone who is prone to constipation is likely to develop hemorrhoids because of all the straining and pushing involved. Regular anal sex can lead to hemorrhoids.

Some claim, jokingly, when they can summon the humor that hemorrhoids are God’s punishment for something they’ve done in a former lifetime, and it must’ve been really, really bad!

Hemorrhoids can be so ghastly that they bring grown man to tears. Having a bowel movement when you are suffering from hemorrhoids is excruciating. Sitting on hard surfaces is equally painful. You will suffer when you walk. It’s a no-win situation.

Many older people have hemorrhoids because the tissues in the anus and rectum that support the veins weaken and stretch as you age.

You need to find yourself a good butt doctor, namely a proctologist, because these bad boys aren’t going to go away on their own. Oh, the pain may ebb and flow, but if you’ve got a bad case of piles, you are going to need medical attention.

Hemorrhoids are veins in the anus that become inflamed and swollen and often bleed. You can have external or internal hemorrhoids or both. An external hemorrhoid looks kind of like a glob of grapes hanging out of your rectum.

The reason external hemorrhoids are so awfully painful is because your butt tissue is covered in nerve endings. The hemorrhoid can be soft and located around the anal entrance, or it can become a thrombosed hemorrhoid, which means a blood clot occurs and the lump becomes hard. Soft or hard, neither is pleasant.

Internal hemorrhoids may not be as painful, but they can bleed when you are going to the bathroom. It is possible for an internal hemorrhoid to become prolapsed, which means it is pushed to the outside. You can shove a prolapsed hemorrhoid back inside, using your hand.

If you haven’t yet reached the stage where you are ready to pick up the phone and call a surgeon, there are things that you can do that will give you some relief.

Take a warm bath. This reduces swelling and inflammation. Put a cold compress against the hemorrhoids. Use OTC hemorrhoid creams or suppositories. Use wet wipes when you wipe your rear end because this isn’t as irritating to the hemorrhoids as is toilet paper.

If nothing has worked for you, there are surgical treatments available. One kind is called ligation. A rubber band is wrapped around the external hemorrhoid. This cuts off the blood supply to the hemorrhoid, and it dies and falls off. This procedure is not pleasant, but all things are relative. It isn’t going to kill you, but you are going to experience some pain, and you will feel like you need to have a bowel movement after the rubber band is wrapped around the hemorrhoid.

Ask your physician about sclerotherapy. A chemical solution is injected into the vein, and this causes the hemorrhoid to shrink. Another process involves using a laser to burn off or shrivel up the hemorrhoid tissue. This is called coagulation.

If you have protruding hemorrhoids or permanently prolapsed hemorrhoids, you may require surgery, which requires hospitalization. The aftermath of hemorrhoid surgery is no walk in the park, but you will eventually heal and feel 1,000 percent better than you did before the surgery. Yes, the first bowel movement post-surgery is going to have you crying out for mama, but you will survive. Sob if you have to. You won’t be the first man to do so post-hemorrhoid surgery.
If you don’t have hemorrhoids, or you just had hemorrhoid surgery and don’t ever want to experience them again you can prevent the appearance or reappearance of them by eating better. Eat whole grains, vegetables and fruits. Whole grains make your stool bulkier, which makes it easier to go to the bathroom.

If you have to go to the bathroom go. Don’t postpone it. When you do this, the stool becomes dry and hardens, and it is hard to excrete it.

Drink a lot of water and fluids because this makes your stool softer and easier to pass. Try not to sit so much. Get up and walk. When you sit or stand for too long this puts pressure on the veins in your anus. Exercising helps you stay regular.

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My Take:

Now you know the score. Do not ignore your hemorrhoids (how can you?) Get treatment as soon as possible. Change your lifestyle so that you aren’t as sedentary, which should help relieve constipation. Eat better. Be kind to your butt. OTC salves and medications will help but if you have nth degree hemorrhoids, and you will know if you do, you have to see a doctor. One of the options named above is going to be the solution to your problem. When we say “Pain in the butt” we mean it.

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